No mystery. Here's what it reads, how it decides, and what it won't pretend to do.
Paste your Sleeper league link. The Booth pulls every pick, compiles your league's exact scoring settings, and grades all of it — then writes the report. One shared link; the whole league reads it without signing up for anything. You draft Saturday, you read it Saturday night.
Every pick is measured against where the market actually valued that player, and the value is computed in your scoring — per-yard decimals, yardage-game bonuses, kicker distance bands, defense tiers, whatever your league invented in 2009 and never revisited. Grades are curved across your league, so the letters mean something and somebody always eats the F. When the Booth says a pick cost fourteen points, that number is real and your league's numbers guy can check it.
On Sleeper, every league carries a link to its previous season, all the way back. So the Booth doesn't just see this draft — it sees the last one, and the one before that. Drafting the guy who burned you last year, taking a kicker early three seasons running: that comes with a year attached. Nothing else in fantasy does this, and it's the whole reason the jokes land instead of hovering.
Presser is what the desk says at the podium — fine for a league with a kid or a boss in it. Locker Room is what actually got said, and it's the default. Extra Guac takes the bleep off. The Booth goes after draft decisions and the character flaws they imply — it will absolutely suggest a man doesn't unload the dishwasher. It won't touch anything nobody chose.
Sleeper is the only platform that hands us your draft, your scoring rules and your league's history automatically, and those three things are the entire product. Rather than half-work everywhere, the Booth works completely in one place. ESPN, Yahoo, CBS and the rest: a paste-your-draft-results version is coming, and the waitlist decides the order we build them in.
Once the season starts, the Booth files every Tuesday morning: the matchup that actually mattered gets the full treatment, the four that didn't get the dismissal they earned, a power table with a point of view, and the ledger — every crime since draft night, still accruing. Season passes open shortly. Get told when.